is this forever!?!?

ever watch the youtube video "david after the dentist"? if you haven't... please, take a minute and watch it by clicking this link.

i'm not gonna expound too much on what the past week has been like, but i have found myself several times thinking random things like:

"is this gonna be forever?" and "is this real life?!"

my perception of life had been so effected by current circumstances that i am giving into doubt, fear, and loneliness like it's my biznasssss. in those many moments that i'm giving into doubt, fear, etc and wondering if things would ever look up, God tenderly reminds me:

{paraphrase} "come on now... duh. of course they will... don't you know Me at all?! I am your source of joy, comfort, strength. I am your provision, your Bridegroom, your Abba. and you, even in your grossest moments of doubt, slavery, sobbing and fear, you are My beloved. I cherish you in those moments; I treasure you in those moments; I will see you through those moments. run to Me while you're tired and burned out, because I will give you the rest you need to face each day; today and forever."

good grief. how great it is to know that i've been promised that momentary troubles are not forever and that this world doesn't even compare to what's in coming in the next life.

and so today i believe that Christ is my hiding place and that He will protect me from trouble. i believe that He surrounds me with songs of deliverance. (psalm 32)

that promise alone is enough to keep trekkin.



it's the beginning of another new year and i'm flippin' pumped! here are just a few "goals" {resolutions, dreams, thoughts, etc} of what i hope the next year has in store.

::goals for mmxi::

don't change this list.
be grateful. no matter the circumstances.
become a ping pong baller.
love my neighboors.
savor my daily Bread.
run townlake at least once a week.
slow down while driving... and talking. and thinking.
quero practicar mi espanol!
experiment with soup recipes.
take pictures for fun.
read the lord of the rings series.
play barefoot at zilker in the summer.
become a mozarts regular.
live simply. simply live.
have more saturday picnic + frisbee time.
visit mount bonnell more than last year. (3+)
visit my parents more.

let's do it, 2011... you only come once and i'm gonna take advantage of you!!!
p.s. i need friends for basically all of these, so please join.


eternal merriment.

merry christmas friends. i think this hymn puts it very well why we celebrate. these lyrics are rich; taste and see that God is good:

Come, Thou long expected Jesus
Born to set Thy people free;
From our fears and sins release us,
Let us find our rest in Thee.
Israel’s Strength and Consolation,
Hope of all the earth Thou art;
Dear Desire of every nation,
Joy of every longing heart.

Born Thy people to deliver,
Born a child and yet a King,
Born to reign in us forever,
Now Thy gracious kingdom bring.
By Thine own eternal Spirit
Rule in all our hearts alone;
By Thine all sufficient merit,
Raise us to Thy glorious throne.

i love seeing extended family and eating amazing food. i love sharing stories with my grandpa and playing with little cousins. i love baking with the ladies and watching football with the guys; hearing about my lil' cousins' high school drama and college adventures. watching my grandma observe the room and opening the presents that overflow beneath the christmas tree...

...but all these things don't compare to the true source of our merriment. Jesus came so that we could have life to the fullest extent. while food is good, it can lose it's flavor. family is precious, but their love can only go so far. presents are fun to give and receive, but soon they'll be collecting dust.

Christ came to give us life in the fullest of senses. while all those things i listed i love and enjoy, i cherish this season because it's a time to rejoice that Christ has given us real Life. real Love. real Freedom. real hope and joy that will last for all eternity.

He is the source of eternal merriment. Hallelujah, what a Saviour.


all that sparkles.

each christmas my grandpa blesses each of his children and grandkids with a sizable check. it's always a much anticipated moment of our christmas celebration together because let's face it... what grownup isn't secretly hoping for a little growth in their bank accounts or more resources to pay off a loan.

this year, after receiving my check from papa, my 4-year-old cousin aubrey came up and reached for the envelope that was in my hand. the envelope was white with a glittered christmas tree and contained the check papa had just given me. i handed it to her waiting to see what would unfold.

she opened the envelope and pulled out the check... holding both in her hand she studied them. she looked at the scribbled writing on the check, and then to the christmas tree on the envelope, then back to the check. after a few seconds of gazing at both items she handed the check back to me and toddled off with the envelope to show her brother her new prized possession.

i giggled inside cause my weird lil' brain saw a spiritual parallel.

the check aubrey held was worth quite a bit... way more than that little envelope. however because of the "packaging", because of what she saw on the envelope, she took it for more valuable or desirable. in her mind she had chosen the better of the two options she had held even though she'd given up the only thing of worth.

good grief.

how many times have i held something in my hand of true value and exchanged it cause i saw something else that glittered? praise the Lord that God opened my eyes to true worth and value, however i am still like aubrey in so many ways... looking at the appearance of a thing and valuing it passed on what i see, no on what it's truly worth. when all is said and done, Christ is the thing worthy of seeking, treasuring, and valuing during our time on earth. so often i invest my heart, mind, soul and body into things that may glitter for a time, but will soon reveal their real value: nothing.

it's so easy to look at cars and clothes, savings and salaries, beauty and beaus and think that those are the things that are truly valuable and worth clinging to. i need so much reminding and help remembering that Christ alone is valuable. Christ alone is worth clinging to. Christ alone can comfort me in any and every situation i will face in life.

no amount of money, measure of beauty and depth of human relationship can sustain the human soul through life. Christ alone can; He created our soul, therefore He alone can be the sufficient caretaker of it.


resist and he will flee.

::submit yourselves, then, to God. resist the devil, and he will flee from you.::
james 4:7

that is a promise.
that is a promise.
that is a promise from God!

and that means it is true.

but good grief... i need help believing that promise and walkin' it out. why do i approach life thinking i'm going to fly through it without hindrance? i find it so hard to submit to God before i submit to trying to control situations myself.

Jesus, bind my heart to You, for i know that it is there alone where i find freedom and life. help me resist the schemes of this world that are so alluring. You are good.

our eternal comforter.

growing up i used to fall up (yes, up) these tile stairs at my house. it would hurt so bad because 1. they were tile and 2. i'd typically be running up them when i'd fall cause let's face it, i'm a bit of an energetic person. when i would fall my mom was never far behind with open arms and some t.l.c. (tender lovin' care).

for some reason the image of crying in my mom's arms has been coming up in my mind allot lately. as these memories come, i'm hit with the thought that in those moments, my mom probably never felt more loved and needed. those moments in which i would just nuzzle into her lap and weep are now tender times of intimacy that i share with very, very few people.

i can't help but think of how when we are hurting-when we are hurting from the pain of our most recent fall-that God is there longing to be the One who holds us as we cry and work through the momentary pain. He yearns for us draw near to Him, to be still before Him and just let His truth set us free from the anxiety and fear that enslaves us (john 8:32).

isaiah 26:3 tells us that God will keep us in perfect peace when our minds are steadfast on Him and trusting Him. i need to be reminded of this so much. i know that the only eternal source of comfort, life, hope and joy is Christ, yet i often try and fill my longings with temporary things like relationships, business, food, control, etc...

but He is still there. calling to me out of my position of pain into the lap of His loving comfort and eternal peace that surpasses all understanding.

run to Him.
run to Him.
run to Him.
run to Him for He alone can comfort, no matter the hurt.


a word.

the following is found in isaiah thirty-five. i couldn't not share.

"the desert and the parched land will be glad;
the wilderness will rejoice and blossom.
like crocus, it will burst into bloom;
it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy.
the glory of lebanon will be given to it,
the splendor of carmel and sharon;
they will see the glory of the Lord,
the splendor of our God.

strengthen the feeble hands,
steady the knees that give way;
say to those with fearful hearts,
'be strong, do not fear;
your God will come,
He will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution
He will come to save you.'

then will the eyes of the blind be opened
and the ears of the deaf unstopped.
then will the lame leap like a deer,
and the mute tongue shout for joy.
water will gush forth in the wilderness
and streams in the desert...

...they will enter zion with singing;
everlasting joy will crown their heads.
gladness and joy will overtake them,
and sorrow and sighing will flee away."

y'all... Christ makes blind eyes see. He makes lame feet leap and mute tongues sing praise. how great and merciful is He.

apart from Christ i am blind, lame, mute, deaf, dry and barren. He alone brings spring to my step, sight to my eyes, song to my tongue, and streams of living water to my soul. apart from Christ i am dead. praise be to the One who redeems, restores and revives this lifeless soul.